Buddy Language
by Delta Story
Summary: A little bit of post-"Acquisition" dialogue between Trip and Hoshi regarding how to handle those oh-so-pesky interludes of male/female communication.


1.1 BUDDY LANGUAGE  
  
(Rated: PG-13)  
  
By Delta Story  
  
(March 2002)  
  
Summary: A vignette in which Hoshi and Trip discuss communication styles. (Spoilers: "Acquisition")  
  
Disclaimer: No harm or profit intended, PTB; just a little bit of joshin' between a couple of the NX-01 crew.  
  
^^^^^^^  
  
  
  
"So we're married, are we?"  
  
"Aw, Hoshi, com'n; it was a joke!"  
  
"And now I'm a joke? Well, I guess I am, if you wanted to trade me to those space pirates for some gold…"  
  
"Hoshi… please! That's not what I meant! Uh… where'd you hear that from anyway?"  
  
"Let's just say this is a small ship. I gather the captain told T'Pol and she thought that maybe I'd be interested in knowing about the little bit I played this whole fiasco."  
  
"Son of a bitch. If the cap'n can't keep his mouth shut…"  
  
"So… was it his idea or yours?"  
  
"Well, mine, I guess. It just sorta came out. But it was just the married bit; Cap'n Archer was the one who wanted to trade you for gold!"  
  
"He did? What is it with you guys? And, why me, anyway?"  
  
"Well, I sure could'n've said the sub-commander; she woulda had my hide! As it is, I don't think she's gonna forgive me anytime soon for waking her up and standing over her in my undies. Besides, well, all I could think of was seeing you earlier, laying there in the launch bay, looking so sweet and pretty…"  
  
"And what makes you so sure that I would be any less taken aback by such… you think I'm pretty?"  
  
"Well, sure! I mean… yeah, you're better looking than the average Starfleet female."  
  
"Oh? And just what is that supposed to mean?"  
  
"Aw, Hoshi; you're twisting my words. Com'n; I… I just had to come up with somethin'!"  
  
"You know, Trip, you really know how to make a woman feel special."  
  
"Do I now?"  
  
"Hey… I'm being sarcastic!"  
  
"Yeah; I know. Guess that's why I've never really done well with the women folk."  
  
"Do tell."  
  
"More of your sarcasm, right? Well – just what would you suggest I do?"  
  
"You really want my advice?"  
  
"I wouldn't be asking you for it if I didn't. I'm sick and tired of striking out all the time. Three times I thought I had it made… and three times they walked out on me."  
  
"Are you sure it wasn't just a girl in every port? I've heard about some of you 'old time' 'Fleeters."  
  
"Hoshi, I've been working my butt off for the last twelve years building a career… and working to launch a decent space-faring starship. It hasn't exactly left me with a hell of a lot of time to develop my sweet-talkin' social skills."  
  
"That's for certain."  
  
"Look, you're the one who knows all there is to know about language and words. Just help me learn how not to get so tongue-twisted or rattlin' off all the wrong stuff all the time."  
  
"Well, sometimes its best just not to say anything at all."  
  
"Yeah, I know. It's probably all my yakking that's done a pretty good job of alienating a goodly number of folks."  
  
"You've just got to learn to listen to yourself before you speak, that's all."  
  
"Hoshi…"  
  
"Now, see? That's just it; let me finish! As an engineer, you've been trained to react without thinking; a good engineer almost has to be able to react to a situation quickly. The way you handle emergencies leaves you little time for actually thinking about your actions. You've just extrapolated that trait into all aspects of your life and, because of that, you find it difficult to see the total picture."  
  
"Hey! I helped the cap'n devise a plan to get rid of those friggin little jumbo-lobed gnomes, didn't I? That required somethin' more than actin' off the cuff…"  
  
"Yes, yes it did. But that's not exactly what I'm talking about."  
  
"Now see? What we're doing here is just like it always is with you gals; you never come right out and say what needs to be said!"  
  
"And that's because you're not really listening. Trip, language has a lot more to it than the words that come out of your mouth. Why, even your sighs in this conversation have said more than anything you've actually verbalized."  
  
"Is that so?"  
  
"Yes, and the way you just tightened up and crossed your arms tells me as much as the tone of your voice. Tell me – is that how you react whenever any woman says something to you that questions your confidence or motives? Because if it is… then I think we've discovered one of your problems. Just in doing that you have told her that you don't want to hear anything more, that you've built a wall and she's not to come any further."  
  
"Okay; my hands are down now. But what the hell am I supposed to do with them?"  
  
"Do you want her to feel accepted and needed? Do you want her to respect you as a special person?"  
  
2 "Hell, yeah! Why else would I be there with her, listen to all her jabberin' and…  
  
"Trip!"  
  
"Uh. Sorry."  
  
"Let's think back into the conversation. Has she put up any sort of a barricade by crossing her arms or turning away from you?"  
  
"Sometimes."  
  
"Okay. Then in those cases, you stand there, at ease, but look directly into her eyes. Try to sense where she's coming from."  
  
"Okay; point made."  
  
"I know that if a person is really sincere I can read it in his eyes before I can hear it in his words or almost any other action. It's really difficult for the eyes to lie when they're in direct contact for a little while."  
  
"Aw come on, Hoshi; that's all a bunch of crap."  
  
"Is it? When was the last time you really looked into a woman's eyes? What did they say? Why, you can't even look me in the eye right now, can you?"  
  
3 "Hey, I'm not trying to find out if you're lying or not!"  
  
"You just said that what I said was a bunch of… hooey. Why wouldn't you want to find out if I'm lying? Or… do you already know that what I'm saying is the truth?"  
  
"Okay, okay; so I'll look. Man, you've got pretty eyes. Anyone ever tell you that before?"  
  
"A couple of times."  
  
4 "Kinda like little liquid pools of dark chocolate…"  
  
"Trip!"  
  
"Sorry; I just had to say that."  
  
"Well, maybe there is some hope for you yet!"  
  
"All right; maybe there is somethin' to what you're saying. But let's say I do like her and really do want everything to work out… you see, that's been my problem before."  
  
"Well, if she's really trying to help you… help both of you… and she sees something in your eyes that says something, she might reach out and touch you."  
  
5 "Uh, oh; here we go. That touchy-feely stuff…"  
  
"You don't like to be touched?"  
  
"Well, yeah. But it's just that it makes me feel like she's tryin' to own me, or somethin'."  
  
"No, it's those barriers again, that's what. You're feeling like you're losing some control. If you really like her, you'll 'invite' her into your space; you'll welcome her into sharing with you. That's what the eye contact does… it unlocks that closed space."  
  
"And that's where I freeze up. Look, Hoshi, there's a lot inside me that she might not want to see or that I might not want her to see; I haven't always been an angel."  
  
"What makes you think that she has? Maybe you'll find out that you have a lot more in common than you think…"  
  
"Yeah, but maybe that's what scares me – to think that there might be somebody else out there like me!"  
  
"Is that all so bad? I mean… I think that you've got a lot going for you."  
  
6 "Really?"  
  
"Really!"  
  
"So… are you going to clue me in on what you mean here… or are we gonna have to continue with your little game?"  
  
"This isn't a game; I'm trying to teach you something!"  
  
"Sorry; chalk up another one."  
  
"Right. Okay, let's go back to where we were. You've made this eye contact and now both of you are ready to move into each other's space."  
  
"Now you're the one who doesn't want to make eye contact."  
  
"Well, I… I… "  
  
7 "See? If you look right into mine, you get flustered!"  
  
"I can look into your eyes."  
  
"Do it."  
  
"All right."  
  
8 "And not laugh!"  
  
"I'm trying; I'm trying! It's just that… well, it's just that I can tell that you're trying to get me to laugh – that you don't want me to take any of this seriously."  
  
9 "Hey, would I do somethin' to mess around with you like that?"  
  
"To get me off the subject? Yes."  
  
"Aw, I still say that you're just plain scared."  
  
"All right, if that's the way you feel… there; I'm serious now. Want to try this again?"  
  
"Yeah."  
  
"Um…"  
  
"Uh, oh."  
  
"Maybe we shouldn't be…"  
  
"Uh… no; don't think we should be. Let's just say we did and move along. What should happen next?"  
  
"Well… um… you might want to touch her in some way. Not anything intimate, but just an invitation to get closer."  
  
"Yeah; nothin' personal. Just a friendly little gesture, huh?"  
  
"Right. Um… this touch might be a pat on the shoulder or touching her arm… just something to find out if it's all right to come within her comfort space and to let her know that she's welcome within yours. It can be like this…. or like this. Um… this isn't bothering you, is it?"  
  
"N… no; go on."  
  
"Okay then. In doing this, you're trying to say, 'Hey! I really want to get beyond this. I really like you and want to get to know you better.' Can you see what I mean?"  
  
"Y… yeah."  
  
"You move in steps… gentle little steps. Just like the spoken word, you don't want these touches to yell or bellow or speak out of turn."  
  
10 "Uh…just how'da know that's what happens?"  
  
"I can read it in your eyes."  
  
"That bit again, huh? Look, Hoshi; I don't think that…"  
  
"Hey! This is the fun part; you have to try to find out."  
  
"Aw, com'n; this is just what I mean – games!"  
  
"And you don't like to play 'games'?"  
  
11 "I thought you were going to teach me how to say the right things!"  
  
"Then how about letting this do the talking?"  
  
"Uh… that tickles, Hoshi."  
  
"Well, then, how about this?"  
  
12 "Oh, man! That's not a tickle…"  
  
"And this?"  
  
13 "God, Hoshi… what sort of message are you trying to send?"  
  
"See? It's all in how you interpret the actions."  
  
14 "Are you sayin' that what you did didn't mean nothin'?"  
  
"Well…"  
  
"Look me in the eyes, Miss Almighty Language Expert. Let me see just what you do mean. Tit for tat, little lady."  
  
"I… I…"  
  
"Ha! Caught ya at your own game! What's the matter – afraid to let me know?"  
  
"No; it's just that…"  
  
"It's just that you're afraid that if I do read somethin' in those limpid pools of yours that I might discover some little ole secret."  
  
"Okay, let's say you did. Could you follow through on it without alienating me?"  
  
"I could try."  
  
"How?"  
  
"Well, first, I'd reach over and touch your cheek…"  
  
"Uh… and then…"  
  
15 "And then I'd take your hand and bring it up to my cheek…"  
  
"Um… okay…"  
  
16 "Then I'd reach around you and pull you up close, like this…"  
  
"Yes…"  
  
"And then I'd… open your eyes, Hoshi."  
  
"Why?"  
  
"I want you to see what's going to happen next."  
  
"And what's that?"  
  
"What would you like it to be? That's why I've got to look you in the eyes."  
  
"N… no; I can't."  
  
"You can't? Why not?"  
  
"I'm afraid."  
  
"Well, damn. There I've gone and done it again."  
  
"No… that's not it at all; if anything, you've done it too well!"  
  
"Hoshi, I…"  
  
"I know; this isn't the way I expected this to go, either."  
  
"It's not that I don't want anything… to happen – quite the other way."  
  
"I sort of thought so."  
  
"Did you?"  
  
"Yes. Going back to what started all of this – your little Freudian slip."  
  
"Oh. Yeah. That."  
  
"It… it really was sweet of you to 'defend' me and all…"  
  
"Sheesh! That wasn't any defense! My God, woman – I almost got you traded away!"  
  
"But you 'fought' the captain for me!"  
  
"Yeah; and I'm still feeling a little worse for the wear for that bit of play action."  
  
"Want me to get something from Dr. Phlox for you?"  
  
"Nah; I'll live."  
  
"Really; let me do something for you to help make amends."  
  
"Well, now – if you really want to make me feel better, we could go to the mess hall and see if chef has made any more of that pecan pie."  
  
"I heard that's something that those monsters cleaned out of the food servers."  
  
"Yeah. Well, I guess they do have good taste about one other thing."  
  
"Are you really hungry?"  
  
"Starvin!"  
  
"Mmm. I don't think they've really got things up and going in the galley yet."  
  
"Well, I'm famished! After all, I've been doin' a fair amount of running all around this ship in the last few hours. You know – huntin' for the cap'n's gold…rescuin' folks… commitin' 'mutiny'…"  
  
"Hmmm. You know, although I don't have any pecan pie, I do have a decent food supply in my quarters."  
  
"Rations? No, thanks."  
  
"No – I mean real food! I cook there."  
  
"Really? How?"  
  
"I have a hot plate."  
  
"Is that legal?"  
  
"Oh, yes. I checked with the captain. He said that it would be all right if I didn't abuse the privilege. It's really quite handy for those times when I need to be by myself for long periods of time to study and work."  
  
"Well, then -- how's about a nice porterhouse steak and some home fries?"  
  
"Sorry… can't do that. But, I'm certain there will be something there to satisfy you."  
  
"You're sure?"  
  
"Look me in the eyes; see if I'm telling the truth."  
  
"Oh, yeah. I think I see somethin' there that will take care of my hunger."  
  
"I thought you just might."  
  
"So… is this the end of my lesson?"  
  
"Mmm. I'd like to think of it as just the beginning."  
  
"Whatever you say, teach. Somethin' tells me that I'm going to need a lot more instruction!" 


End file.
